THIS CONTENT IS SPONSORED BY PRUDENTIAL
Discussing money can be a hot-button topic in marriage and family relationships.
Difficulty handling cash is often cited as a top reason why married couples squabble and divorces happen. And financial stress can fuel more problems by inciting family clashes, possibly harming interactions between parents and children.
According to this new report, only 38% of American adults report contentment in talking about their bank account balance with family members and close friends.
Conversely, open-mindedness, transparency, vulnerability, and trust are among the persuasive tools that can be used to help couples and their families more cordially discuss money.
The bottom line: Creating trustworthiness and openly chatting about financial concerns can provide open disclosure and help nurture healthier alliances for those involved.
That is important, as this study showed around 20% of couples pinpoint money as their largest relationship challenge.
Bringing up money issues can be uneasy, but it is necessary to help build strong financial groundwork for existing and future generations. For instance, a person’s view of how money should be saved, invested, or spent could differ from someone else’s, potentially causing conflict. To help address such matters, BLACK ENTERPRISE connected with Donovan and Dominique Boyd. As such, it was mentioned how courage, grace, tolerance, and patience can also help create unassailable ways to discuss money.
Husband and wife, the Boyds are successful real estate investors. Married for 15 years, they have three children. Dominique calls herself a wife, mother, and entrepreneur who works in corporate America. Donovan labels himself a senior real estate investor. They shared insights on working together to manage finances and teach their kids about money.
DON’T ALLOW SALARY DIFFERENCES TO BE A SETBACK
A helpful tip is creating a platform that can help families move beyond barriers to avoid having conversations. Donovan suggested a “recipe for disaster” is keeping things secret and separate. The money topic was made smoother for the Boyds as it was discussed from the start.
Donovan added navigating things separately can cause division.
“Early on, we tackled that. How are we giving the same amount if one person makes more than the other? So, we’re blessed to stop bumping our heads early on.”
Dominique agreed, pointing out that putting numbers to the dialog was pivotal. “So, it opened the doors for us to be able to have that transparent conversation, him to receive what I was saying, and then us to put action behind it to then move past that initial hurdle.”
TRANSPARENCY IN DISCUSSING FINANCES IS ESSENTIAL
Further, the Boyds are known for talking to couples and others about real estate investing and other areas of family finance. So, what key, critical tips do they offer for people interested in at least beginning the conversation?
Dominique explained that everybody is in a different place in their marriage, and everybody sees money and finances differently. However, she strongly believes transparency is critical.
She stressed that even if there are separate accounts, spouses should know what each other is making and how that contributes to the home’s bottom line. “The No. 1 tool is to sit down and talk about where you guys are financially.”
For Donovan, the No. 2 rule calls for coming together with your finances. He suggests eliminating separate accounts because they create secrecy and division. He advises getting a joint account: “Even if you have, OK, I got a separate account to spend. Rule No. 1: bring the money to the table, [and] get you a shared account.”
TEACHING CHILDREN THE VALUE OF MONEY AND HANDLING BUSINESS
When it comes to building multigenerational wealth, the Boyds have family financial and business conversations with their two sons and daughter. Donovan does it by providing examples of what he does and exposing how he works. That could include taking his sons to some of his projects, letting them listen when he is talking to crews, or taking them to a store while picking up materials.
“So, that right there for me is big in the foundation piece of them understanding how to run a business, how to protect your money, the value of the dollar.”
For Dominique, she is very transparent with the bills. For instance, that includes sharing about what things cost, what they look like, how much money is being brought in, and what chores equate to. She also teaches her kids about responsibility. So, if they don’t do the job to her expectations, then you don’t get paid. “And it’s all or nothing. So, they’re learning a hard lesson in that way as well.”
Being proactive about having family chats about money, including how to build generational wealth, may not be easy, yet it is truly worth it. Avoiding those talks can spur greater conflicts in the future.
“It takes a lot of work from both sides,” says Dominique. “You don’t have to take the same path, but you have to want the same end goal, and that has to be communicated.”
This communication is not a testimonial or an endorsement. It is provided for informational purposes only and should not be construed as investment, insurance, financial, tax, or legal advice. Please consult with your own advisors for such advice. Dominique & Donovan Boyd are non-client, non-paid promoters of Prudential Financial. To learn more about the material terms of the compensation arrangement between BLACK ENTERPRISE and Prudential Financial, please go to prudential.com/blueprints
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